"G-ma" is me

I am "G-ma". For now, anyway. Steve (my son) and Sandy call me both "G-ma" and "Jamma" rather than "Grandma". I like that! Most of all, I love with a passion the fact that I am a grandmother. I never especially wanted to be one - didn't want to feel 'old', even though the years don't lie. But, darn it! I LOVE being a grandmother. What changed me? Jace. My grandson changed me, of course.

My grandmother friends have all told me many times that there is nothing like it. They have all been - and are - blissfully happy in the role. There was no way to relate to that happiness, however. Sure, it's great. You have a grandchild. He/she is adorable. That's as deep as it went. I couldn't enter that realm until it really happened to me.

Now I am a member of the club. Now I feel what it is they were talking about. I can totally relate. It is a heavenly gift. It is unvarnished love - on both sides, the giving and the receiving. It is unexplainable. It is a wonderful thing.

I'm not trying to be secretive. It's just impossible to explain how I have been changed by this little person who has entered my life. It's very different from being a parent, and not because 'you can spoil them and send them home'. That's not it at all. Maybe it's part nostalgia. I am so much back in the space I was in when I was a new mother...and yet it is different.

I love being G-ma.

Be Kind

Being kind is sort of who I always try to be. I'm not always successful. Certain people always bring out the worst in me, and give me reason to keep trying to be better - but mostly, kindness is basic to me. Recently I've read a quote (unattributed) about being kind to others because you never know what kind of burden they're carrying. Today I read the blog page of someone I care a lot about. I only knew hints of the problems she had faced in her young life, and still don't know everything. The courage and love she has shown and the good judgment, kindness and common sense she demonstrates on a daily basis are the opposite of what has been given her on so many occasions.

I've had my share of sorrows, some so deep I didn't know if I could get through them, but I have had a relatively easy time, and I count my blessings daily. I've never faced the issues she has had to face, which include dreadful childhood trauma. Congratulations to her and to all the survivors of inhumane and/or criminally ignorant behavior. God bless all who have suffered, and best wishes that they too will survive with happy and grateful hearts. It's not easy to do, but this person shows me that it can be done.

Be kind. Others carry burdens we can't imagine. Our kindness may be the thing that helps them get through another day.

That DNA

On the second Bob Newhart show - the one with Larry, Darryl and Darryl - Larry admired his two brothers and said, "There's somethin so great about that DNA". I loved that line and thought of it today when I was holding my very sleepy grandson.



He is his daddy's son. No doubt about it. The DNA is strong. He looks like him - and like many in my family for various reasons. He has Mike's and Roger's cowlicks in the front of his hair. I can see Mike sometimes, and Roger at other times. He has his Mommy's eyes and mouth...except his eyes are blue and hers are dark brown like mine. He looks a lot like her. He has his grandfather's blue, blue eyes. He has his Daddy's eyebrows...and mine...and Chris's. Having mine, he has my mother's too. That DNA runs strong. He is a very good mix of his Mommy and Daddy, with a whole lot of his daddy's family DNA thrown in for fun. He is named for his Mommy's uncle and for his own uncle - his daddy's brother Chris. Most people who know the family immediately say, "Oh! He looks like Chris!" And he does. He is Jace the Face, Jace Christopher, and he is a totally beautiful baby boy.

But what made me think of the DNA today and Larry's proclamation about the greatness of it was his daddy (my son.) When Jace is sleepy he thrusts his head back and forth into my shoulders when I'm trying to ease him into sleep. Back and forth, head butting as he turns his head from side to side. It is not a timid baby move. It is a thrust. Forceful. It is exactly what his daddy used to do. It takes me back 30+ years to when I held his daddy in my arms trying to get him to sleep. Exactly. 100% the same. It could be my firstborn I am holding instead of my firstborn grandson. A human time machine. My heart can surely hold no more joy.

Larry had it right. There's somethin great about that DNA.

(The photo is of Jace after his first feeding of cereal with a spoon and is just shy of his three month birthday.)